I finally made a youtube!
For the last 10 years I've been paralysed by what people think of me.
That fear has lost me hundreds of opportunities.
When I was 16, I was convinced I could be a big story-time Youtuber. I wanted to tell stories of all the crazy sh*t I was getting up to as a nightmare teenager 💀. (Probably best I didn't in the end 🤣)
But the reason I never started was because I thought everyone at school would make fun of me.
Well, that time has passed anyway.
(And my subscriber count still sits firmly at 0)
And I've always wondered how different my life would have been if I'd have just not give a sh*t about other people's opinions and consistently showed up online for the last 10 years.
Surely I'd have had SOME success by now, right? 😩
This week, that "what if" was just too loud to ignore. So here it is, my first ever youtube video. 🙂
I've realised a big reason I've put this off for so long was actually a fear of my "Internet persona" not being received well.
The person I showed up as online, would people like her? Would she provide enough value? Does she have everything figured out in her career, health, relationship?
But actually, I've made sure to just show up as me.
Me, where I don't sound any different, don't act any different and the video (and myself) are imperfect in all the ways that are human.
So if people don't like it, and people don't like me, that's totally okay.
I can live with that, because I know I'm at least being my true self: Just a normal girl going through life trying to be better than yesterday.
Anywho, that's kind of what my video is about. This vlog is essentially me having a mini existential crisis from not feeling like myself here in Vietnam, and what I'm doing to get back to me.
If you're interested, here's the link
Enjoy :)